After enjoying a weird week with a weird friend with a lot of
weirdness, well, my life is back to normal. The goal is within sight now.
People always complain me of being different from them and see me
differently. I wasn't born different, I chose to be different. I have tried but
couldn't get along with people. They called me an ‘introvert’. I accepted it.
I was never able to stay with one group of people. So, no one cared
for me. I was stereotyped. People just saw parts of me and assumed I was like
this and like that. They didn't know that what I showed them was what they
deserved and not what I am.
Why should I blame myself for not being able to cope up with the
crowd?
I am not wrong. The whole crowd is wrong. Yes, I know that I don't
talk superlative, cool stuff. I don't go to parties, I don't dance. So, I am
that obnoxious little nerd. You call me anything, I don't give a shit. The
truth is I am bored of these people and I cannot be one of them.
They tell you must compromise on a few
things to maintain a healthy relationship
(read it as all relationships, not just with a girl!). I want to do the
things I like. Why should I compromise? I live my life, not their's. Yes! Now I was
called stubborn. The world has a hundred opinions about you. If you react to
each of them, you just lose hundred chances to make your life awesome.
This
weirdness in me was the main reason to not have a stable relationship with anyone. I had discrete relationships all my life (So far!). I was never able to gel with
the ‘normal’ people (funny they call themselves normal!). This made me wander
from one ethnicity to another. People called me a ditcher. I smiled and replied,
yes I am.
It is always important to balance the
logical and emotional quotients in us. I don’t believe in fairy tales. We abuse
a friend and respect a boss. Technically, heart trusts a friend and abuses a
boss.
Love a girl but marry her if you are
logically satisfied with her. I might be sounding rude but these are the
lessons I have learnt from married people :P
Parents are always our caretakers and might
influence our lives to a great deal. It is sometimes required for us to go
towards what we want than what they want. My mother always wanted me to be in
the safe path. If I had chosen that path, I could have not been where I am
today and she graciously accepts this fact.
And finally to summarize, I never got along
with my friends and never listened to my parents. This turned out to be my
normal self but abnormal to others.
An opportunity comes in everyone's life
which decides our future. A few realize it but let it go; rest of them never
realizes it. There are the other “select few” who realize and leave their
comfort zone to chase their dreams.
I was quick to recognize this opportunity (As I shared in Goal- The story of my life).
Now, the next question was how to pursue it. Google cannot answer everything. I
remembered one of the famous quotes.
“If you don't work towards your dream, you
will have to work to fulfill someone else's”.
This statement mocked me every day. I felt
helpless many times. I reached a lowest point wherein I presumed it's better to
work for someone else and find happiness rather than worry every now and then.
This is the time when we think of family and friends. It hurt me more now than
ever. I hated myself for not maintaining a good relationship with my friends and for not following the safe path my
mother made for me.
A few months passed and I regretted for few
things I had done and for the most things I hadn't done. If you leave hope in
your life, even the hope doesn't hope for you.
Then a thought passed my mind. Of course a
stupid thought. My brain had long back given up the art of thinking creative
things. I wanted to find a good life partner to achieve my dreams. Yes, you can
laugh at this stupid thought :P. I dated a few girls who were more bothered
about make up and flowers rather than goals and dreams. I spent more time
talking but not executing ideas. Well, the talks weren't great either. A few
conversations are listed below.
She: The weather is very romantic; we must
go for a walk in the park.
Me: It might rain, it's better to stay
indoors.
She: Weekend J J. We will go for a movie and then dinner.
Me: Listen to this awesome idea!! This
venture will surely work…
She: You are so disappointing.
She: Today is favorite color day. Which
color do you choose?
Me: Red.
She: Nice J J. Bring me red roses.
Me: You meant color day right and not
flower day?
She: I hate you, you are a nerd.
It was disastrous. I tried hard, everything
failed. Maybe, it was meant to fail. I learnt a lesson; wife is a liability if
you choose the wrong one.
The black days continued. My desperation
had no meaning and I started living my life in hostility.
As is always the case with Gods, they
appear after the man has lost all hope and has decided to ignore everything in life,
this happened in my life too. Yes, the Gods came but the weird ones. These
weird ones were just as weird as me. They make you feel one of them. They share
the same weirdness and thoughts as you have. You really cannot fight with them,
how can you fight with yourself?
I met a guy who taught me how to get over
failures. Rather he taught me how to enjoy failures. He's the silent guardian
the world deserves but doesn't need. Because the world doesn't know it needs
him. I generally don't get motivated by anyone. He is one of the few who can motivate me.
We met only once in person but meet regularly online. The insights we share
have been very helpful to me (maybe to him also). It makes a lot of sense to
meet the right kind of people and enter into the right relationship. No, I am not gay with him. We share a common mindset,
the weird mind set. This keeps us going.
This weird guy introduced me to another
weird person, a weird girl. We formed a team called Southern Scouts (I didn't
try to find out why he named it so). She has been very instrumental in
understanding me and guiding me in the right direction. She’s basically a busy
girl but doesn't mind sparing some time for the people she cares. She calls
herself the mad hatter (for reasons known only to her :P). Did I reveal too
much?
Anyway, she is the secret person who is
working for my success.
I thank these two people and many others
who have molded my life. The seed is sowed and now is the time for the plant to
grow.
Final note:
The point is I am into the right kind of relationship, the weird relationship.
Everything happens in life for a reason. There’s nothing wrong in getting
disappointed. We must fall to learn to pick ourselves up. I know it sounds very
weird to talk about weirdness right after posting an article about how Weirdness Makes Life Beautiful. After all it was a weird week, wasn't it?
(If you didn't get it, go back to the first
line J)
